Congressional Fisticuffs – American Limp Wrist Sissies

There are many things in this world to be despised, most of them originating with deceit.

When it involves women, the gravest deceit is typically infidelity. When it involves men, the greatest deceit is generally lack of integrity.

Thus, when American politicians last month began their false bravado and temporary testosterone nonsense it was less amusing than pathetic.

Nothing grates so much as the fake "Tough Guy”.

Kevin McCarthy — Backstabbing 'Bitch Slapper'

Following his removal as Speaker of the House, broadly-unpopular Representative McCarthy was evidently walking in the Capitol behind Representative Tim Burchett, an individual who had recently voted for his dismissal.

As Burchett was in the midst of an interview with Claudia Grisales, McCarthy took the opportunity to prove once and for all he is a namby-pamby little girl and elbowed the colleague in his back.

This is not merely a claim by Burchett but allegedly witnessed by at least one member of the media.

To which, the sissified McCarthy did what all weaklings do when caught out…deny, deny, deny.

It wasn't his fault! It was a mistake! No one saw it! (Oh, they did? Then they are liars!)

Just to be eminently clear — No man strikes another man from behind. That's something sissies do. By definition, if you attack a fellow without warning you are nothing more than a feminized, Tampax-sporting, inherently cowardly waste of male human organs.

At the very least — and even this would not excuse such a tremendous perma-menopausal episode — McCarthy should have said these things afterward:

One, yeah I did it but I really hate that guy.

Two, even so I was totally wrong and I'm ashamed of my estrogenic behavior.

Three, if the other fellow wants to forgive me and shake I offer my apology and if he wants a free shot he's entitled so I'll clasp behind my back and let him have a single open punch.

Instead? McCarthy is wallowing in his Sissihood.

Shameful. You're limp, Kev. Limp.

Markwayne Mullin — Quintessential 'Gym Bro'

During a heated verbal sparring Senator Markwayne Mullin of Oklahoma took umbrage to comments from Sean O'Brien who is President of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters.

Mullin, who is the classic "Tough Guy” that never throws an uppercut, challenged O'Brien to duke it out. To which O'Brien stated "you stand your butt up” to fight. Whereupon Mullin demonstrated he wears frilly lace panties by pantomime rising and then immediately coyly sitting once more.

Had Mullin some testicles, rather than a gaping (likely quite loose) vagina dangling between his legs, as soon as he was invited to throw down he would have gotten up for good…except he didn't.

Mullin instead sputtered a proverbial, "Nahhh bro, after you! I know you are but what am I!?!”

Some would claim in defense of the waffly womanized Senator that he is a former Mixed Martial Arts fighter to which this author replies…Oh, you mean like in an organized match? With a referee? And a myriad of spectators? Yeah, "Tough Guy”, you're all Juice and no Squeeze.

Mullin, Sportsfans, is what is commonly referred to as: a "Gym Bro”.

The good Senator is the type of sissy who talks real hard until the time comes to get hard. Then he's all about the back-and-forth of threats and hyperventilation. No one should fear his pretend-muscles because those pecks are all for the perks of an inferior ego.

To illuminate for Our Readers the image of a GENEUINE tough guy this author presents to you the fight scene from Cool Hand Luke with Paul Newman. As will be noted, once the fight begins Luke does not surrender. Despite a merciless beating. In spite of being wildly overmatched. Luke fights.

Because being an authentic tough guy is not about winning, it's about keeping going — the fight is with your honor, not necessarily your opponent.

Mullin AKA "Gym Bro” Markwayne is all preening pussy without any fearless heart.

Talk a Walk with Me, Chums

So here's the deal — To be a tough guy you don't need to be Weaselly like Meadows and you don't need to be Steroid Man like Mullin…you only have to have a little respect — for yourself and for others.

Physical fighting is rarely the ideal solution, but when it is you do it and you don't talk about it.

By way of illustration I verily invite all challengers to the crown of "Tough Guy” who are NOT public figures with hordes of bodyguards to amble around someplace such as Sicily in the dead of night.

What will happen there to an ordinary individual?

Likely nothing. At least, not to guys who act right. Unfortunately, if any insist on being a "Tough Guy” then maybe some things might happen.

A regular non-political person attempts to start "Tough Guy” fights from behind? A regular non-political person tries to flex and toss "Tough Guy” stares?

Well, maybe someone finds themselves — or someone else next morning finds them — floating in the bay with a Sicilian Necktie…and in all probability courtesy of some wiry skinny fellow you never suspected but sought to intimidate.

Me? I'll be back at the hotel with a swarthy beauty. I'm a lover, not a fighter.

After all…I don't pretend to be a "Tough Guy”….just an honest one.