US ELECTION: “WHAT’S THE NEWS?”

“What’s the news?” “Well, the good news is that the US election has finished…and the bad news is that Bush has won” “How?” “Good question, but remember, his father was Vice President for eight years, director of the CIA and President for another four years”. “So George Bush Junior inherits his father’s intellect?” “Not exactly…he managed to get a zero in an English test once and the rest of his academic record is not too brilliant”. “But he did get to University?” “Oh yes, to Harvard Business School…” “That proves something! It is an excellent school. He must have had very good exam results to be accepted” “Well, not really…he got in because there is a special place for family members of previous students” “When did he first get mentioned in the Press?” “In 1967, he was mentioned in an article about burning the back of new students with red-hot metal coat hangers” “I heard he was a pilot, a hero like his father!” “Well, no, he was a pilot…” “In the USAF?” “No, in the Texas National Guard” “Anyway, he must have got a high mark in his piloting exams to be accepted” “No, he got 25% and entered ahead of 150 people” “Did he make his name in oil, like his father?” “No, in baseball. He was the Director of the Texas Rangers Baseball Club” “How did he get his nomination for the Republican Candidate for the Presidency?” “There was nobody else” “But he must have some qualities…he’s probably a good public speaker” “I can give you an example of his speeches…here’s one: I think we can agree that the past has finished “I see…well maybe he has a firm hand at foreign policy…the Americans like that” “Mmm, he did say The motive to start a war is to fight the war, win the war…and like this, not cause more war “How long will he be the President for?” “Good question”

John Ashtead Pravda.Ru London