European Union Declares We Must Make Pigs Happy!

Within 90 days British farmers are to supply toys to all pigpens, otherwise they can be fined with 1.000 pounds or sent to jail for three months. New regulations and directives from Brussels will be given the status of a law in England next week.

In accordance with the new regulations, British farmers must “give toys to pigs so that animals could be happy and stopped chewing each other.”

Mark White, former president of the Pig Vet Society says that pigs are in habit of chewing each other, which by the way doesn’t depend upon conditions in which animals are kept. He said, they often chew each other’s tails and ears. “That is why we hope that when pigs get toys they will never be bored and give up the bad habit of chewing each other.”

The department for environment, foodstuffs and agriculture issued instructions saying that farmers must give soccer and basketball balls to their pigs. A spokesman for the department said: “After a while, farmers will have to substitute the balls with new ones so that pigs won’t be bored.” It is also recommended to hang up chains in pigpens for pigs to scratch their snouts and heels.

However, British farmers are not very much enthusiastic about the new recommendations. One owner of a large pig herd says he has already tried the new method. “I threw a plastic plane and a teddy bear into my pigpen. They drew attention of several animals, and in several minutes the toys were gone.”

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