Women and men: The sexual aspects of behavior in the shower

A woman taking a shower:

1. Take off the clothes and put them in the bins (white clothes separate from color ones). 2. Go to the bathroom, wearing a peignoir. If you meet your boy-friend or husband on your way to the bathroom, cover the naked body parts and run. 3. Look for a sponge for the face, a sponge for the hands, a sponge for the legs and a sponge for the body. 4. Wash your hair with “four in one” shampoo with 83 vitamins 5. Wash your hair with that shampoo again 6. Use the hair conditioner for 15 minutes 7. Apply a face mask to clean your face – 10 minutes. 8. Shave the underarm areas and legs. 9. Turn the shower off 10. Wipe all wet parts of your body. 11. Carefully examine your body – maybe there is a pimple somewhere. If you find one – attack and destroy it. 12. Go back to your room wearing a peignoir and a towel on your head.

A man taking a shower:

1. Take off your clothes and pile them. 2. Go to the bathroom naked. If you meet your wife or a girl-friend on your way to the bathroom – show her, how proud you are of the thing you have. 3. Look in the mirror and admire the size of your penis and the relief of your abdominal muscles. 4. Do not look for any sponge, just wash your face, armpits, the male treasure and the area around it. 5. Wash your hair, do not care about the shampoo. 6. Do not forget to pee in the shower. 7. Do not care about the water spilled on the floor. 8. The water from the shower curtain should drop down on the floor of the bathroom. 9. Look in the mirror. Admire the king size of your penis. 10. Leave the light in the bathroom on and go to your room with a towel around your waist. If you meet your wife or a girl-friend on your way from the bathroom – show her what you got under the towel. 11. Throw the wet towel on the bed. You got two minutes to put your dirty clothes on.

Translated by Dmitry Sudakov