Some Women Find Faults Even with Paradise

There are quite a few people who are never happy with anything. They would find a reason to be displeased even in the paradise-like environment. Here are several distinctive types of misery guts.

Photo: Some Women Find Faults Even with Paradise

Some Women Find Faults Even with Paradise

Clever Elsa

The type is named after the main character of a German fairy tale. A farmer’s older daughter got married. She was particularly bright, or at least she thought so. It was a small wedding – the groom and the bride, the bride’s parents and her younger sister. When the party finished a jar of wine, the father said: “Elsa, take the jar, go to the wine cellar and get more wine from the barrel.” The girl went to the cellar, filled the jar with wine, and was about to go back when she saw an axe hanging on the hook above the barrel. “Trouble is brewing, “she thought. “Let’s think logically. I got married. We’ll have a boy. He’ll grow up. One day my husband and I will work in the field. We’ll get thirsty and send our son to the cellar to get some wine. He will bend over the barrel; the axe will fall off the hook and split his skull.” She sat down at the barrel and began crying.

Meanwhile, her father sent his younger daughter to see what was taking the older one so long. The younger one came down to the cellar, saw Elsa crying and wondered what was going on. Elsa told her the sad story about the axe and split skull, and the younger sister sat down next to her and cried. Soon the father sent the mother to check on the daughters. The mother joined them. Later the father had to go to the cellar himself. He heard the same sad story, and since he learnt in his long marriage that women were always right, he sat next to them and cried, too. Soon the groom was tired of waiting and came down to the cellar. He saw his relatives crying and wondered what had happened. He was told the story. The groom listened to the entire story, but instead of crying, he took the axe from the hook and put in the corner. “Don’t sweat it,” he said.

This is a fairy tale, but living with this type of women is much more difficult. They see the signs of an imminent catastrophe in everything, be it change of government, two day delay in salary payment, an extra bottle of beer consumed by their husband, or mittens left by their kid at home.

The mental outlook of these women can be compared to the one of those who live near an active volcano.

Prosecutor

Every woman experiences ups and downs, success and failure, gains and losses. There are many reasons to it. Sometimes it is their own fault, sometimes it is the fault of their environment and other times the circumstances are to blame. But those who fall into the Prosecutor category have the only explanation for all their failures, downs, and losses – men are the ones to blame. Every man is perceived as a potential enemy . It does not matter if it is their husband, lover, co-worker, fellow passenger, or a plumber who came to repair a leaking tap. The logic is simple – if you are a man, you are to blame.

The list of crimes committed by men against women includes but is not limited to the following: government crisis, lack of a sexual partner, cellulites, low salary, ruined tights, and problems at work. What about a punishment? If there is a crime, there should be a punishment. Don’t worry, the usual punishment is bugging. The reason for bugging can be anything at all. The other day a lady was bugging her husband for a bag of sunflower seeds he left in a store. This might be a new world record.

Prostitute

Some ladies regard having sex for pleasure or to please the husband as self disrespect. They have to make a man either open his wallet or make numerous promises before they have sex with him. Their professional colleagues support them – there is no place for charity in this business.

Procrustes, or Supermodel

Procrustes, a Greek mythological figure, tried to change the appearance of every person he met.

If someone was too tall, cutting this person’s legs would fix it. The short ones would be stretched out. Procrustes even invented a special bed, the prototype of a contemporary surgical table. Should he live in our days; he would have become a plastic surgeon.

As for the women in this category, they are very unhappy with their looks, even if they are popular with men. They are “too tall,” “too short,” their breasts are “too small” or “too large.”Those who are not happy with their weight calm down only when malnutrition drives them to grave.

Komsomolskaya Pravda