The European Committee suggested banning eggs in their shell, very rich oil fields were found in the Tokyo Gulf. The war in Iraq did not stop newspapers and several international organizations from celebrating the Fool’s Day yesterday.
The European Committee made one of the funniest jokes, when it banned eggs in its communique. Spokespeople for the respectable organization said in a rather serious manner that there could be a lot of cracked eggs found in food stores. It was added that eggs, which are meant to be boiled hard, are supposed to have two layers of shell, while eggs, which are meant to be fried, are supposed to have usual shell.
The Japanese newspaper Tokyo Shimbun reported that there was a huge oil deposit discovered in the Tokyo Gulf. As it was said, the reserve of the new oil field was 110 billion barrels, which was equal to the reserve of Iraqi.
The new instruction came into effect on April 1 in Denmark. The new European instruction allows Muslim people to have several wives. The Islamic council informed that it received a lot of people from Danish men, who wished to convert to Islam in order to be able to have several wives.
The United States of America gave up the idea of building a new embassy in Berlin’s Paris Square, in front of the building of the French embassy. Such a decision was made against the background of a recent quarrel between the two countries. This information was published by the German newspaper Tageszeitung. As the newspaper wrote, Washington demanded the name of the square should be changed in order to execute the project.
Australian Daily Telegraph advertised a device, which allows drivers to make their cars invisible. As it was written, drivers could use the device to avoid various road fees.
Russian President Vladimir Putin is going to make another change in the government. Putin is going to dismiss incumbent Defense Minister Sergey Ivanov and appoint pop-singer Nikolay Rastorguyev (the leader of the Russian pop-group Lube) for the position. The Izvestia newspaper wrote that the singer never served in the army, although he is widely known in Russia for his patriotic songs, which Putin likes himself.
The Izvestia also published several jokes about the Iraqi war:
Saddam Hussein: “Hooray! We downed an English plane! George w. Bush: “That’s a lie! We shot it down!”
Here is another one:
“Mr. Bush, do you have any evidence to prove that Iraq has weapons of mass destruction?” – “Yes, we still have checks to prove the payment.”
Iraq became a reason for April 1 jokes for the Kenyan newspaper East African Standard, which wrote that since it is very hard for American soldiers to move in the Iraqi desert, the US Army was going to hire heat-accustomed servicemen in Africa.
South African Beeld also made a joke about Iraq. It was said that Saddam Hussein was offered an influential position of an advisor in the oil industry in South Africa. Yet, there was an obstacle: despite guarantees of the American and British coalition, Saddam Hussein insisted that South African president’s personal plane should be outfitted with an ABM system, since Hussein is going to use that plane for his business trips.
Greek conservative newspaper Eleftheros Typos wrote that director Michael Moore was deprived of his Oscar award on account of his anti-war statements. Kathimerini, the rightist Greek newspaper, wrote that Athens and Washington signed a secret agreement to deliver fresh vegetables, macaroni and lubricants to American troops in Iraq. As the newspaper wrote, the signed document would give an incentive to the export of Greek goods.
French Journal du Pays basque wrote that Defense Secretary Michele Alliot-Mariot recorded a CD, the sales profit of which would be spent on the needs of Iraqi children. Czech newspaper Vecernik Praha write that Winter Olympic Games of 2010 would take place in Prague, and that the freestyle part of the Games would take place in the center of the city.
The European Union chancellery in Athens made a joke on its official site. It was said that the chancellery was going to cancel the stability and economic development treaty. The message vanished from the site several hours later, though.
The Bulgarian newspaper Sega suggested making the Fool’s Day a national holiday in the country. “A joke is the essence of the Bulgarian policy today. We pretend that we work, our employees pretend that they pay us, we pretend that we pay taxes, while the government pretends that it uses them in the best way,” the newspaper wrote.
American Presidents, Vice-Presidents, Secretaries of State, Defense Secretaries, White House staff, and many Senators and Congressmen display many or most of the traits of criminal psychopaths and mass murderers