"I was a weird kid," says Brad Garrett, then adds, in a tone of rueful satisfaction, "It's easier to be a weird adult."
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More rewarding, too. Garrett scored nine seasons on "Everybody Loves Raymond" as Ray Romano's hulking, hangdog brother. And now on the Fox sitcom "`Til Death" he's a hulking, hangdog hubby butting heads with Joely Fisher as his mate of nearly 9,000 days.
Even better, this time Garrett is top dog.
"It was all part of my scheme," quips Garrett in his mournful baritone: "to one day have my own show where I'm getting beat by Telemundo."
Now, now. Since premiering last fall, "`Til Death" may not have been a ratings powerhouse. But in its new time slot Wednesday, right after "American Idol," lots of new viewers are likely to discover the factious world of high-school history teacher Eddie Stark and his not-so-joyous wife, Joy.
Theirs is a marriage where any issue is worth bickering about.
On one episode, Joy says you save electricity by unplugging the toaster oven when it's not being used. Eddie says no you don't.
And he can't rest until he proves Joy wrong.
"I never feel more alive in my life than when I'm showing the woman I love how wrong she is," he tells fellow teacher Jeff (Eddie Kaye Thomas), a young newlywed whose marriage to Steph (Kat Foster) is, so far, all hearts-and-flowers.
The viewer is invited to regard these two couples as an exhibit of marriage's natural evolution: a Before and After display. Or maybe they represent the extremes (love and war) that coexist within a typical marriage at any given time.
Whatever, an observer may find that "`Til Death" has a bitterly funny ring of truth.
It did for Garrett when he read the pilot script and decided to sign on.
"I'm a lot like this guy," he says, taking care to draw distinctions between Eddie and Robert, his Emmy-winning character on "Raymond":
"Robert is a ho-hum, downtrodden guy who kind of goes with whatever somebody is putting in front of him at the moment. Eddie is more of a trailblazer, more outspoken. That's what attracted me to him: He's VERY outspoken.
"And couldn't be more wrong most of the time!"
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